If you know me well you know giving up alcohol was never high on my priority list, I love my white wine! So why all of a sudden am I pulled to give up alcohol for an entire year?1
Alcohol, especially wine, are highly recommended in mom groups as a way to deal with day to day stress. Often if a mom posts asking for advice on how to deal with out of control kids or stressful situations, you will see several people pipe up suggesting wine as the answer.
Of course having the "blessing" of other moms makes it so much more appealing. And its become so normalized for mama to need her evening glass ...or bottle... of wine.
The problem for me is that I used wine as my 'self care'. Being stressed and exhausted I would grab a glass or two of wine to relax me. Unfortunately thought the initial few sips offer the desired effect, the wine would cause the opposite of what I intended. Alcohol made me tired, dehydrated and more miserable in the end. So for me this is a need to improve my coping skills and self care. While I've had no issues giving up alcohol completely for my pregnancies, doing it just for myself seems so much more daunting.
I'm not used to focusing on my needs and putting myself first. My self care in pretty inexistent. Quitting alcohol for a year, and maybe longer, will force me to actually use proper self care methods.
After discussing this with my husband, we decided to tackle a year of sobriety as a team. Both of us feel that alcohol doesn't serve us and is somewhat pointless. We want to use that energy to focus more on building up our YouTube business.
What are your big goals for 2019?
Are you doing something totally out of your comfort zone?
My darling three year old has started misbehaving.
Hitting her older brother and not listening.
I could say that it’s the age, or that she needs more discipline.
But my heart knows the truth.
Three months ago my darling three year old daughter became a big sister. We welcomed a baby girl into our family with open arms. And my daughter became a middle child. She lost the role of family baby, a role she had held for three years.
She loves her baby sister, simply adores her! But I know she misses the time she got to spend solo with her mama. Her mama who is constantly too tired or too busy these days.
We’ve taken for granted that she’s so independent. These last few months we’ve expected her to entertain herself, and keep herself busy while we attend to life, to her older brothers homeschool lessons, to our work and to the baby.
An independent middle child myself I should have been more aware of this, realized how much she really needs. But my overwhelmed mind can’t even remember what day of the week it is.
Today she wanted to play hairdresser, a favorite game where she brushes my hair and we take on the personas of ‘Coco’ and ‘Kiki’. Finally forced to sit still for a while I whip out my phone to catch up on a few Instagram posts and some emails. I mindlessly muttered a few “mmm hmmm’s” to ‘Coco’ as she happily chatted while brushing my hair.
Tonight as I’m trying to put both my girls to sleep, and one is crying her evening tears and the other one is asking me to hold her hand it hit me like a ton of bricks. And I felt so much sadness for my darling daughter. She needs her mama more. She needs more than a mindless reply as I’m catching up on work. She may be independent, but she also need’s her bestie to listen to her and actually spend time with her.
This season of motherhood is hard, but I foresee more hairdresser appointments and Barbies in my future.